kill butterflies

Colleen Brazier
- I'm not quite sure what my blog is about anymore.
These are so cute, love the iron man.

These are so cute, love the iron man.

(Source: pinkstripedmellon, via likecubed)

Going through Tumblr in a public library and hoping the people I follow haven’t posted the usual naked banter.

But no hopes are dashed, thanks guys for making me look like a creeper.

thisisfartoosilly:

toturnonthelights:


from left to right; 
I am afraid to hold my boyfriend’s hand.
My friend’s parents sent her away.
I found death threats in my locker.
I submitted to electroshock therapy.
I lost half my friends after coming out.
My grandmother sends me hate mail.
My school won’t let me take my date to prom.
I am not here anymore.
My dad tried to beat it out of me. 
No one is proud of me.

This showed up on my blog again. Forever reblog.

thisisfartoosilly:

toturnonthelights:

from left to right; 

I am afraid to hold my boyfriend’s hand.

My friend’s parents sent her away.

I found death threats in my locker.

I submitted to electroshock therapy.

I lost half my friends after coming out.

My grandmother sends me hate mail.

My school won’t let me take my date to prom.

I am not here anymore.

My dad tried to beat it out of me. 

No one is proud of me.

This showed up on my blog again. Forever reblog.

(via porcelaindreams2-0)

I love him :)

I love him :)

(Source: simonkjaerlighet, via swagwalker)

Fromheaventohellandbackagain.

The last little while, I’ve been relatively happy except for the usual hating on college. I’ve got back into my painting and am still decent at it, I’ve been writing a little, reading more and generally doing the things I love. I’ve been chatting to amazing people, talk pretty regular with Deuchs and Megan etc and it all seemed fairly good. But today I reached a weird new low. I saw someone who was covered and I mean covered from elbow to wrist with scars on both arms, obviously self inflicted and I smiled.

I smiled.

I’ll be the first to admit that was more than a little strange, I mean as an ex self harmer, it was obvious to feel a connection of sorts about being through the same thing to an extent but I smiled as if reminiscing of old times. And the fact of it is, when I really think about it, I enjoyed cutting, taking a blade, or scissors, slicing my skin, seeing the blood trickle out and the suspense of not knowing how long the scars would last. When everything else seemed fucking insane that kept me grounded and secure. It had a hold on me, people get addicted to alcohol, to smoking, to drugs but for me, at the lowest points I was addicted to hurting myself.

But take that away and I’m a wreck. I weaned myself off it a while back and I’m still like fuck what will I do now when I feel shit. I find myself just staring into oblivion at times and coming back to the real world seems so much harsher afterwards, I cry at the stupidest of things and I worry about things which aren’t quite important at the moment of time, like getting old, losing friends, the fear of having no one to love, of not being loved and of never having kids and that scares me the most. With so many people my age or younger having children I worry that I will never be that lucky and at 18 years old, it stresses me out big time. 

Over and out.

This boy has got me believing in soul mate friendships. Met him years ago, lost contact and he magically comes back in my life and I honestly can’t believe how alike we are. I really love him, such a good friend :)

This boy has got me believing in soul mate friendships. Met him years ago, lost contact and he magically comes back in my life and I honestly can’t believe how alike we are. I really love him, such a good friend :)

I like to paint :)

I like to paint :)

Knew there was a reason to love her.

(via fayedaniels)